Benjamin Franklin supposedly observed that beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. Super Bowl XLIX is proof that God exists and roots for the Patriots.
We can now close the book on “Deflate-gate,” the non-scandal about the supposed under-inflation of the footballs used by the New England Patriots in their January 18 victory over the Indianapolis Colts. For we now know the cause of the reduced air pressure.
It was not Tom Brady. It was not Bill Belichick. It was not the anonymous locker room guy. It was not even Ben Affleck or Matt Damon or the many others who bravely stepped forward to take responsibility.
God deflated the footballs. Continue reading